Monday, November 17, 2008

Pros and Cones

TCG: If you’re going to the kitchen, will you bring me back a chocolate ice cream milk shake?

UCC: I was actually going to the happy place in my mind, can I bring you back a dose of Anti-Laziness Potion, or perhaps a chocolate ice cream cone of despair?

TCG: Isn’t the kitchen on your way to wherever the hell you’re going?

UCC: Yes. As is the abattoir, the slaughter house, the henhouse populated with carriers of the H5N1 virus, the giant freezer where I store my unrealized dreams, and the bathroom. Can I pee for you while I’m up, you lazy bastard?

TCG: You’re not a funny as you might think.

WISIMN: Nor are you as delightfully charming, as accomplished at covering up your paranoid suspicions, as proficient at controlling your smoldering resentment before it bursts into flames of bitterness, or as successful at restraining your self-inflicted self-pity. So that makes two of us, dear heart.

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